Patty, here is a Hometalk project that shows how to distress wood.

https://www.hometalk.com/42350819/diy-how-to-distress-wood-projects

DIY How To Distress Wood Projects

Patty....The aging is often done with sand paper and just sand edges until you get the look you want. You might practice on a piece of wood before finalizing on you furniture just to get an idea.

I would use chalk paint and then sand with sand paper! Here are some tips: https://www.aratariathome.com/blog/chalk-paint-tips

We have done some antiquing of furniture and even our guest bathroom cabinet. It is black then we antiqued it by wiping away small areas just so the wood barley shows through and even used sandpaper to rough it up a little. Here is a video that may help you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iz38oLGpKGc

There are lots of different methods, it all depends on what you're distressing, but in general here's a good DIY. https://www.hometalk.com/30806292/modern-farmhouse-diy-distressing-paint-technique

Modern Farmhouse DIY Distressing Paint Technique

I like using a sanding block to give it the look. It's a trial & error process to get the look you want. Start small and then age additionally until you get it to the level you desire. I hit with light, small strokes at an agle.

Here's one piece that was distressed for an old farmhouse look here on Hometalk. It provides pretty good instructions! https://www.hometalk.com/35191857/outdated-nightstand-to-old-farmhouse-chic

Outdated Nightstand to Old, Farmhouse Chic!

I very seldom sand to distress. I time it so I can use a wet sponge to wipe paint off in the areas I would distress just before it sets completely. Very easy and doesn't leave scratches.

Age wood

https://www.hometalk.com/search/posts?filter=%20age%20wood

Distress wood

https://www.hometalk.com/search/posts?filter=%20distress%20wood

Distress furniture

https://www.hometalk.com/search/posts?filter=%20distress%20furniture

This tutorial shows how to paint and get a distressed look with chalk paint: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2IfajLvo2xM

Here you go: https://do-daddy.com/how-to-distress-painted-wood-furniture/

Patty: Here's my coffee table project. It may be helpful.

https://www.hometalk.com/44255352/1960s-coffee-table-into-2020

1960's Coffee Table Into 2020

You can use an electric sander on the edges, don't use too coarse of a paper it will take off too much. You can hand sand as well, use a fine grit sandpaper.