DIY Ideas to convince elderly mother in law to come and live with us?

Sounds like you should sit down with her and express your concerns and ask what SHE thinks should happen. Most people don’t want to be told (like a child) what should happen. Maybe she in good enough health NOW to love on her own (I would invest in a emergency response button system) Ask if she would consider rethinking it in a set time like 6 months. Then drop it until then. Its very hard to live in a home so long then give it up. I get it, but many enjoy assisted living once the major move is over. Does she have concerns over whether she will be used as a babysitter or not allowed to drive? Good luck I’m sure you mean well.

I could be your mother, probably, at least age wise. Leave your mother-in-law alone. She does not want to live with you for her own reasons. She knows she has arthritis. She is not "stubborn" for her age . . .what do you think people have personality changes when they get older? When people insist so on us doing something "for our own good" it raises lots of red flags.

Hello I am Peggy, I have a 96 year old mother that still lives alone. I want her to come and live with us we have a small mother-in-law home on our property. Change is always hard especially when you are older (I hate change), but just keep telling her she is welcome and you would love spending the time with her. In the end it must be her decision. My mom feels she will be leaving a part of Dad if she leaves. Give her time, love and encouragement. Good luck

I don't know how old your mother in law might be but I can tell you that is she still manages to take care of herself, function in the world, and keep her place clean and orderly, you should let her enjoy being independent. Most people realize when they can no longer take care of themselves. If she cannot do this, then, it is time to have a very frank discussion with her about your concerns and her needs.