Asked on Dec 10, 2018

How do I keep my children content in the rental while home is rebuilt?

EllisBetsyJason T. Lee
+6

Answered

We lost our home to a fire and my kids cry everyday. How do I kerp them happy in a home that has no comfort?

8 answers
  • Kathy Gunter Law
    on Dec 10, 2018

    Depending on their age, encourage them to design their new room. Remind them how fortunate your family is that you did not lose someone in the tragedy.

    You can put vinyl stickers on the walls in your rental to help temporarily personalize it. Dollar Tree has flowers, dinosaurs, farmhouse, jewels, princess, Disney, and more. Purchase special bedding that each child picks out.


    Bless your family in this tough time.

  • Gk
    on Dec 10, 2018

    Hello Deonne. Sorry to hear about the fire and losing your home. It is so sad and difficult when every single thing you had is suddenly gone. How old are your children? How many children do you have? Have you been able to replace some of their favorite toys? Are they old enough to go to a preschool or other setting where there are other children to play with? Tell us more to get some helpful ideas.

  • Nan W.
    on Dec 10, 2018

    I am so sorry that you have had such a hard time -- especially with children. Why not get them outside for fun --- to pick up pretty rocks for a home collection? Find a park to run in! Go on a scavenger hunt -- https://www.pinterest.com/pin/255579347579747387/ ...and make this a fun time away from from!

  • So so sorry for your loss. There are so many people that face this tragedy, and it is not easy by any means.


    Depending on their ages, explain to them how lucky they are and that they are survivors - not victims. It's 99% in the attitude you exude. Get them distracted by drawing pictures of their new rooms and when the time comes, let them help pick things (within reason), for their new spaces. Get them outside and gets lots of exercise at a local park, jump rope, hopscotch, play ball, etc. As long as you look at it as a new adventure, they will too. Get them back to their former routine as much as possible. Encourage them to discuss their fears and hopes for the future.

  • Jason T. Lee
    on Dec 10, 2018

    Been there! The key is interaction. You’re going to need to focus on their schedule very carefully. When they are busy they are unlikely to notice their surroundings. Giving them projects and assignments when they have nothing to do helps. Spend family time talking about some of the difficulties that each of you are facing and try to find some solutions to help. Try telling jokes, I told them extra corny jokes they called “dad jokes” and do things away from the house whenever possible. Honestly although our time away from home was difficult we also could that it gave us opportunity to grow closer. Good luck!

  • Jason T. Lee
    on Dec 10, 2018

    Also found, not also could

    • Betsy
      on Dec 17, 2018

      HAHAHA never noticed that, I even read it as 'also found':)

  • Betsy
    on Dec 17, 2018

    Hi Ms. Deonne: One thing you might try is to give the children a couple pieces of paper and have them draw pictures of what they want their new rooms to look like. Even give them catalogues so that they can cut out pictures of beds, curtains, rugs, etc., Get them involved in what colours the rooms will be, and the rest of the house, too. Even the yard. Go by the house and check on the progress and get them excited about moving back in, a light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak. Good luck and I'm so sorry about your struggles.

  • Ellis
    on Dec 17, 2018

    I am so sorry that you're going through this. One thing I have learned is that children are very sensitive to their parents' attitudes. If the rental is not comfortable, try to introduce the idea of adventure into it--as if it's camping out indoors, maybe? Hard as your situation is, try to be the glass-half-full mom. Point out how lucky you are that everyone is safe, and they will soon be back in their old neighborhood with a safe new house. If they're old enough, it's also not a bad time to teach them that what you all lost is just stuff, but you have what's really important--each other. If your house being built is nearby, can you take a picture every week and show them the progress?


    If you talk about the new house with anticipation, and do as others here have suggested and give them a chance to look forward to their new rooms/home, that will help a lot. While new everything might not be in the budget, choosing maybe one special new thing, or their choice of comforter color and theme for the rebuilt house, might occupy them while you wait.


    I wish you happiness now, and in your rebuilt home.

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